Personal abuse and mistreatment were my constant companions throughout my three and a half decades of illness. Even after recovery it is an endless sorrow to think of how physicians, family and activists acted to make the experience of M.E even more unbearable.
I have past the point where it is possible ever to express the pain and anguish that I feel. The last time I tried I fell down writhing and hurt myself.
I have repeatedly warned the M.E community that its
behaviour may lead someone to end their life. You cannot report harm to
M.E patients, charities, activists and their new allies in academia. If
you try, the abuse increases ten-fold.
And this is a deadly state of affairs.
Any M.E patient targetted for ruthless bullying by M.E activists and charities must immediately work to extricate themselves. It is better to be alone and ill than to live under sustained assault.
As to the damage done; the way to keep going is, I think, to find a way to transform all of the pain into productivity. The blows were meant to destroy. They were meant to leave you in silent suffering forever. What better use for all of that awful energy than to transform it into something good? What greater victory could ever be had?
Both the targets and the perpetrators of abuse must make a change in themselves. And to that end I wish each and every one of you all the luck in the world.
TL;DR summary: M.E activism is dangerous. Avoid it. Transform damage done into productivity.
